Wednesday 13 August 2014

ATP'S "NO DICKHEAD" POLICY CAUSES FESTIVAL TO CANCEL ITSELF



“As I’m sure you’re aware, we’ve always maintained a strict ‘no dickhead’ rule for our events,” explained a spokesperson for All Tomorrow’s Parties. “Unfortunately, founder Barry Hogan caught sight of his own reflection in a mirror at the weekend, so Jabberwocky had to be cancelled without delay. It was like at the end of Dorian Gray, but with extra vomit.”